Why You Treat Me Like a Dog?: May 2006

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Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Hi, I'm Digger, the dermatophyte.

"Remember me? Hello, I'm Digger, the dermatophyte, your naaaaiiiil infection." That's how the ad for Lamisil, a drug to treat a fungal infection of the toes begins. As a physician, I must say that I find most direct to consumer drug ads entertaining at best, possibly informative but generally useless. Worldwide, only the United States and New Zealand allow drug companies to advertise directly. The ads are more or less effective, otherwise the drug companies wouldn't spend the billions they cost. Most patients can now name at least two cholesterol medications, whether they have high cholesterol or not. I've had patients come in asking me for "the purple pill," when a little Tums or Mylanta would do the trick. Ah, Allegra! Live Claritin clear! No one has ever asked me for Valtrex to suppress their genital herpes, yet. Many, many patients have asked for Viagra, Cialis or Levitra for their E.D. (erectile dysfunction), which by the way is the medical term favored by Pfizer to make it easier for men with impotence to ask for Viagra. Either that's an effective ad technique or patients with heart disease have a lot of problems with impotence (they actually do) and that's why so many of them ask for the E.D. drugs. By the way, no one has ever complained about "erections lasting longer than four hours, a rare and serious side effect."

Lately, there's been a new line of ads for Mucinex, a cough medicine, where Mr. and Mrs. Mucus set up house in your airways:

Yuck. I don't like mucus (Mister or Missus). Then of course there are the old Raid ads where they show the bugs croaking.

But then I can't really complain about the drug companies when it has to do with Raid, and this post is about direct to consumer drug ads, so please forgive the digression.

To make a long story short, and all seriousness aside, I think Digger is the coolest. I love the way he flips up the nail like he's popping the hood on a car (that would kill!) and jumps into the nailbed where he and his friends scratch around like a kitty in a litterbox. Lamisil comes around, and, then they die! Not just "pass on," or even "buy the farm." They keel over, look really kind of ill, turn greener and then croak! Poof they disappear! And remember, Lamisil isn't for people with liver and kidney problems. No duh, its for people with nail infections!!! Ask your doctor!

By the way, stay tuned for full-length cartoons coming this summer!

- posted by wanderer @ 9:44 PM 5 comments

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Milestones

Baby wanderer (BW) is nearing the 10 month old mark. It seems like in the last few weeks someone pressed fast forward, and he has just started hitting milestone after milestone in rapid succession:

1) He's crawling - in the forward direction. It seemed like for the longest time he would just lay there having "tummy time," or perhaps crawl backwards a few inches. But now he actually books across the room, follows Bella around everywhere and would probably follow her out into the yard if we didn't catch him.

2) He's consistently saying his first word - as would be expected, his first word was...Bella! Except it sounds more like Deda. Nonetheless he is consistent.

3) He waves and says hi - so effin' cute!

4) He claps. BW watched the American Idol finale with us last week (he just wouldn't go to bed, and we couldn't risk missing it). Everytime the audience applauded so did BW. He voted for Taylor.

5) He made his first phone call. Well, sort of. He must have pressed redial or something, but ended up calling my aunt in Seattle. Luckily, it was in front of us, so we were able to hear her saying "hello, hello" before the minutes started adding up...

6) He can pull himself up to a standing position. Very problematic. It used to be we would lay him down in his crib after rocking him to sleep. He might cry for a few seconds, but then would just fall asleep. Now he actually pulls himself up and stands there crying, which brings me to the milestone he has not yet reached:

He doesn't know how to sit down.

Yup. Not only does he not know how to sit down, he is so afraid to try (because of previous bad experiences), that he will just stand there and cry until we come and help him down. And then what does he do? He stands right back up and the cycle starts again. Oy.

I guess we'll just to wait until he hits that sitting down milestone... In the meantime, there isn't much sleep going on around here. Again. (Note that the yawning hippo is back!)

- posted by wanderer @ 9:53 PM 6 comments

Saturday, May 20, 2006

What Are Your Favorite Song Lyrics?

Jack's Shack and Sweettooth both have posts about their favorite song lyrics. Coincidentally, I had been working on just such a post last week, but through the magic of me screwing up, it somehow got deleted before I could post it. Anyway, in no particular order, here's another go at some of my favorites:

Before you slip into unconsciousness
I'd like to have another kiss
Another flashing chance at bliss
Another kiss, another kiss
- The Doors, The Crystal Ship

This song to me just kind of epitomizes the Doors and Jim Morrison. Sex, drugs and rock and roll! During my teenage, psychedelic phase, this just seemed so cool.

But I remember us riding in my brother's car
Her body tan and wet down at the reservoir
At night on them banks I'd lie awake
And pull her close just to feel each breath she'd take
Now those memories come back to haunt me
they haunt me like a curse
Is a dream a lie if it don't come true
Or is it something worse
- Bruce Springsteen, The River

The Boss just has so many awesome lyrics that he's written. To me this one captures so beautifully the restlessness and desperation of the love story described in the song.

We stop for a while, she gives me a smile,
And snuggles her head on my chest.
We started to pet, and thats when I get
Her talcum all over my vest.
-Nat King Cole, Walkin' My Baby Back Home

A sweet, sweet song that I've always loved. My wife and I chose it to end our wedding video and it works so well!

I am the son and the heir
Of a shyness that is criminally vulgar
I am the son and heir of nothing in particular
You shut your mouth
How can you say I go about things the wrong way ?
I am Human and I need to be loved
Just like everybody else does
-The Smiths, How Soon is Now?

High school. My awkward stage. Enough said.

The monkeys stand for honesty,
Giraffes are insincere,
And the elephants are kindly but they're dumb.
Orangutans are skeptical
Of changes in their cages,
And the zookeeper is very fond of rum.
- Simon & Garfunkel, At The Zoo

I could write post after post of my favorite Simon & Garfunkel lyrics. I love them all. It always cracks me up how Paul Simon assigned random human qualities to the animals at the zoo, and it just works! I've been enjoying singing this song to my son lately.

We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found?
The same old fears.
Wish you were here.
-Pink Floyd, Wish You Were Here

This song brings back many memories. Discussing its meaning in eighth grade English class, singing along at camp, hearing it at a bar in Jerusalem. Who cares what it means?

I can make it through the rain
I can stand up once again on my own
And I know that I'm strong enough to mend
And everytime I feel afraid I hold tighter to my faith
And I live one more day and I make it through the rain
- Mariah Carey, Make It Through The Rain

This song was released by Mariah after she had a bout with severe depression. Some people might consider it (and her) cheesy, but its helped me get through some tough times myself.

I'm fixing a hole
where the rain gets in
and stops my mind from wondering
- The Beatles, Fixing a Hole

Like Simon & Garfunkel, I could write post after post about Beatles lyrics. This one has always appealed to me, because I never understood how the rain gets in and stops his mind from wondering. But somehow it still makes sense that it did...

"There must be some way out of here," said the joker to the thief,
"There's too much confusion, I can't get no relief.
Businessmen, they drink my wine, plowmen dig my earth,
None of them along the line know what any of it is worth."
- Bob Dylan, All Along the Watchtower

No collection of lyrics could leave off the master poet, Bob Dylan. This song was probably made more popular by Jimi Hendrix, but Dylan's version tells it like it is.

And you can tell everybody this is your song
It may be quite simple but now that it's done
I hope you don't mind I hope you don't mind
that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world
- Elton John, Your Song

Like most classic Elton John songs, the lyrics were written by Bernie Taupin. I could well quote the whole song, it really holds together so well, and Elton does such a great job singing it.

So there you have it, ten of my favorites, and there's many many more. Music is just one of the things that makes life so great, no?

- posted by wanderer @ 11:16 PM 14 comments

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Boy, Am I Tired

This is a tiring week for me, as it is every year. It's my wife's birthday this week, and it's Mother's Day tomorrow. Of course, I want them both to be special for her so I made a nice dinner for her on her birthday night, and tomorrow we are having about a dozen family members over for Mother's Day (including lots of moms).

So....yawn....I think instead of writing the long, glorious post I planned on posting tonight....big yawn...I'm going to sign off now....BIGGER YAWN.

Good night all!

- posted by wanderer @ 11:00 PM 3 comments

Tuesday, May 09, 2006

German Court Sentences Cannibal to Life in Jail

This story is amazing, and has been going on for several years. He apparently was initially sentenced to only 8 years in jail after being convicted of manslaughter by a lower court (lower in more ways than one...).

The victim had apparently traveled from Berlin after answering an Internet posting placed by the cannibal under the pseudonym “Franky” seeking a young man for “slaughter and consumption." The victim reportedly wanted to be stabbed to death after drinking a bottle of cold medicine to lose consciousness. The cannibal therefore claimed that the killing was "consensual" because the victim wanted to be eaten. It was all captured on video.

“I wanted to eat him — I didn’t want to kill him,” he told the court.

A grizzlier version of the story can be found in the British paper The Guardian. He apparently first dined on the victim's "privates" together with the victim (!). He then proceeded to kill him, and had eaten 20 kg of the victim's flesh before he was arrested.

Aside from the obvious revulsion this story elicits, what's also amazing to me is that no mention is made in either linked article as to either the cannibal or the victim's mental health. I mean, come on, if anyone's crazy it's this guy, and the victim too. And is the victim really a victim? Sheesh...

At least the higher court recognized the folly of the lower court...

- posted by wanderer @ 10:11 PM 2 comments

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

A Ziploc Bag Full of Super 8 Movies

There's a scene at the end of one of my favorite films, Cinema Paradiso, where the main character, Toto, watches a reel of classic film love scenes, spliced together without sound by the old man who was the projectionist at the town's old cinema. It is accompanied by the film's beautiful musical score and is a wonderful, nostalgic expression of the old man's love for Toto from the time he was a young boy. It is guaranteed to turn me into a bawling, sobbing glob of jelly every time and I love it.

My uncle was visiting recently from out of town. Before he came down, he told me that when my grandmother died several years back, he had found a Ziploc bag full of reels of old Super 8 movies in a drawer in her apartment. He said most of them were labelled with my name, and he asked me if I wanted them. I said sure, bring them over.

A few days later, he stopped by, with the Ziploc bag in hand. It took me a day or so to find a Super 8 projector on eBay. Its a Honeywell Elmo, fully functional in its original box, apparently first purchased in 1968 and barely used. I won the auction for $17.50, shipping was $28.00 and a week later, it arrived.

That first evening, I set the projector up, and after a few minutes of looking it over and figuring out how it worked, I loaded up the first reel.

For the next hour, my wife and I watched eight two minute movies, all of them silent, of a time that I have no recollection of - basically, the second year of my life, as recorded on Super 8 film by my uncle.

At the time I was the only child in the family. My parents were in their early twenties, having left the Old Country to get an education. My uncle (my dad's brother) and my aunt (my dad's sister) were also here, and had not yet married their respective spouses. The films record a visit to the park above Santa Monica Beach, all of us in the rose garden outside the Griffith Park Observatory, and me riding a carousel at the amusement park that occupied the space where the Beverly Center and Cedar-Sinai Medical Center now stand. On another reel, I ride my little bike and pedal car in front of our first house. My mother dotes over me. I am a one year old surrounded by adults, all of whom clearly adore me.

Several things stand out immediately about the films. Of course everyone is dressed in that late 1960's-early 1970's slighty goofy kind of way. My mom's skirts are very short. My father has hair, and his own teeth, with a wide gap between the front two. My uncle drives a Volvo, a curvy one, not like the boxier ones that came later. My aunt, a nurse, is actually dressed like one, with the funny white hat and everything. She drives a cool red 1966 Mustang convertible. My parents have an orange Volkswagen. My dad and aunt are both smoking - you'd think they would have known that it wasn't a good thing to smoke around a one year old back then.

My paternal grandparents make an appearance on one reel - both of them have since passed on.

My wife and I watched the movies - we commented about how funny everyone looked and how much our son looks like I did in the movies.

After we finished watching the movies, we went about our business for the rest of the evening. When I finally lay down in bed, in those liminal pre-sleep moments, I felt a wave of sadness come over me. So much has changed since those movies were made. They are from a different time, so analog, and not just because of the non-digital Super 8 media. There was an innocence I saw in my toddling self, but more importantly I saw it in my parents, as well as in my aunt and uncle. They are the same people now as they were back then, but the years have taken their toll.

In those few minutes of film, I saw a vibrancy and happiness in my mother that I had not remembered seeing in many years. There was a love I saw she had for me that she has not been able to express to me for the longest time, and that I guess I miss on some level. I saw my aunt before she developed multiple sclerosis and its complications. My harsh and abrupt uncle was tender and loving to me. My father had his usual slightly cowboyish swagger, which he carries to this day, but now with an extra 50 lbs or so, less hair, dentures and he finally dumped the cigarettes a couple of years ago.

Watching the films made me sad I think also because I am witnessing my son enter the same age I was in those films. On the one hand I want to take him to the park in Santa Monica and to the Griffith Park Observatory and make a video of our family. But will he someday watch a film of my wife and I with him and also feel a sadness? Will he notice or feel that he was once loved more than he is now? Will there be people in the film who have changed or are no longer around? I don't want him to feel the same sadness I feel now. Or is it all inevitable?

I plan on transferring the films to digital media so that they can be preserved. They hold pieces of my life that I don't remember, and yet they are so much a part of me. I expected to feel nostalgic when I saw them, but not sad like I do. I don't know when I will watch them again, but for now, I am grateful that my uncle gave them to me.

- posted by wanderer @ 11:04 PM 11 comments

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